Eleanor Brunton

In the words of Jane Austen in Northanger Abbey, “There is nothing I would not do for those who are really my friends. I have no notion of loving people by halves, it is not my nature.”

Female friendship is an immense source of love. They are some of the most important relationships you’ll ever have. Whether it’s the girls you went to school with or the ones you’ve met in your twenties, there are some friendships you just know will last a lifetime.

My girlfriends are my support system, the first people I’ll talk to, and my therapists when things get rough. They know everything about me. I believe female friendships are uniquely empathetic and understanding, borne through mutual experiences and traumas that have shaped us into the women we are. I know they’ll hold my hands through every stage of life.   

My female friends are the first people I turn to for outfit opinions. They are the people I belly laugh with until we’re crying in the back of an Uber. They listen to my podcast-length voice notes after a night out. They get matching tattoos with me. We sit in silence together but feel completely comfortable. They help to fix the hearts they don’t break and let you talk about the same situation a hundred times just because they know you need to. There is something completely magical about female friendships.

I’m not saying that female friendships can’t go through periods of conflict and difference, or that they’re unconditional and don’t require effort. Maintaining female friendships get increasingly difficult as we get older and go to university, or move away from our hometowns. You have to invest time in these connections; whether it’s texting them life updates, a weekly facetime, or making the effort to see them when you’re in the same city – as our lives change so rapidly during our twenties, sustaining the friendships of our girlhood requires more energy.

Yet, in my experience, female friendships are the most resilient and enduring relationships I’ve ever had. My girlfriends are so emotionally intelligent and compassionate, our bonds so deeply rooted in mutual support and experiences that they are unshakeable.

As Dolly Alderton wrote in Natasha Lunn’s Conversations on Love, “True friendship is about taking it easy on each other, knowing that life has tides that take you to various places, and that you’ll find a way back to each other at different points”.

Galentine’s Day is the perfect opportunity to show your girlfriends how much you appreciate them. It traditionally takes place on February 13^th, as a moment to appreciate the fabulous women in your life. The term ‘Galentine’s Day’ was coined by Leslie Knope on Parks and Recreation in 2011 as a day for ‘ladies celebrating ladies’. Knope organised a brunch for her friends to celebrate their friendship. This unofficial holiday has become something of a cultural phenomenon since then, with women in many spaces celebrating their platonic relationships with other women. 

In 2020 Michelle Obama shared an Instagram post and tweet celebrating Galentine’s Day, she wrote ‘This #GalentinesDay, I want to shout out my girlfriends who help me stay sane and grounded through all of life’s ups and downs. Whether we’re catching up over the phone, venting over a cup of coffee, or laughing it out during an 80s-themed workout, I know I can lean on these ladies—and that’s made all the difference.’ The same year, Kylie Jenner held a Galentine’s Day painting party for her friends and daughter. In 2024, Amy Poehler (who plays Knope in Parks and Rec) made a TikTok to share how she was spending her Galentine’s Day in New York. In this she said, “Female friendships are the most important thing in your life. The best thing about your friends is they know you better than anyone and they still wanna hang out with you. Happy Galentine’s Day!”’ Jennifer Aniston shared Poehler’s TikTok to her Instagram story and added, “Sending love to all the girl’s girls.”

The holiday is only growing in popularity. Though some suggest its premise is forgetting your significant other, to me it’s not about rebuffing Valentine’s Day or rejecting romantic love: it’s taking a day to appreciate platonic love. Whether you’re single and perfectly happy, going through a breakup, or in a loving, healthy relationship, Galentine’s is a day to celebrate. February 13^th should be a day of empowerment and a moment to appreciate the relationships we have with the amazing women in our lives. Galentine’s Day is not just a day to be observed amongst women, it should be a celebration of the beauty of platonic love with all your friends.

Whether it’s sending your long-distance girlfriends a bunch of flowers, going for brunch, or grabbing drinks with the girls, letting the women around you know that you’re thinking of them is so important. This year Michael Morris and Renée Zellweger have graced us with a new instalment of Bridget Jones’ calamitous and entertaining life, to be released in cinemas on February 13^th, in perfect time for Galentine’s. 

So, this February 13^th, take some time to appreciate the female friendships that surround you. Show your girls so much love because they are your support system and your cheerleaders through every stage of life. Dolly Alderton said it best in her bible of female friendship, Everything I Know About Love, when she wrote, ‘When you’re looking for love and it seems like you might not ever find it, remember you probably have access to an abundance of it already, just not the romantic kind…You have so much to gain and learn from this kind of love. You can carry it with you forever. Keep it as close to you as you can.’